next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
