I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
