u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
