after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Randomize
