She's JV to your varsity
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
