it wasn't lemon gatorade
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
