I wish i was in the wii world.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Two words: blizzard sex
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Randomize
