before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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