I'm eating all of the evidence.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
