On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
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