North Korea, Best Korea!
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Randomize
