return my video game
U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
