The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
We're using joints as your birthday candles
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize
