That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
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