i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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