oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
