i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
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