is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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