And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I love you. Go after that dick
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize
