how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
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