ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
I have tasted many bathrooms
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
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