I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Panties = found
Randomize
