we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
