"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
