I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
We have so much sex to catch up on
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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