what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
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