yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
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