its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize