I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
