What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Text me some of your sweat
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
