would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
