you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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