no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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