I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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