I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize