your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
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