If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
