All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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