? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Randomize