you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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