I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
