We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
you told grandpa to call you daddy
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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