Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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