Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Randomize