Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
