his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
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