Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Blow job season was short but glorious.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize
