just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
