I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize