bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
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