Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
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