How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize