id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Randomize
